2 Week Wait From Hell

Gosh this is turning into quite the two week wait (2WW).

Previous 2WWS have been a walk in the park by comparison.

On Wednesday morning, 7 days after embryo transfer, I began bleeding. Not a lot of blood, but enough to be noticeable. It stopped by mid afternoon. I went from being sure this cycle was over, to allowing hope to creep back in when, by Saturday, I’d had no more blood loss.

Then last night I started bleeding again. Just before bedtime, which was perfect for keeping me awake worrying until gone 2am. Yey.

I’ve had light spotting all day today, on and off. This is accompanied by lower back ache and mild cramps, both of which I’ve experienced all 3 times I’ve been pregnant, but which can also be symptomatic of miscarriage.

So, yeah.

I have still to wait until Thursday this week before I can take the test. It feels like an eternity away. I am physically and emotionally exhausted.

As much as I know I don’t look forward to this part of the cycle, I forget how totally exhausting it is. How the heck people go through this and hold down a full time job…hats off to them.

Each time I’ve been through IVF, things have progressed differently. I thought I’d pretty much seen it all:

– Period before pregnancy test = negative
– Sudden, gushing, traumatic miscarriage after positive test.
– Slow, steady, progressively increasing miscarriage after positive test.

And now…
– Random on and off bleeding during 2WW.

Just when I think I’ve got a bit of a handle on what to expect, something different happens, at a different stage. A new thing to endure, where I have no prior experience. I feel like I’m inside a futuristic “Web MD IVF experience generator”, covering all the bases lest an anomalous case present and not be properly recorded on the database.

Gosh, I’m tired.

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